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Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Teen Haule...(3 idiots).., apne Hyderabadi ishtyle me..


1 Farhan Qureshi bolke haula rehta,
1 Raju Rastogi bolke haula rehta aur
1 Rancchoddas Shyamaldas Chanchad bolke sabse bada haula rehta.
Teeno engineering karte rehte Deccan College se, ab Deccan bole toh samajh jao kitta padte so.

Rancho k bawa MIM k MLA rehte toh une full paise wala rehta.
Farhan k bawa Yaqutpura State Bank mein kaam karte toh unu thode bhot middle class rehte.
Raju k bawa mazoor rehte aur amma teacher rehte, toh wo loga aakhri faqeera rehte.
Asal Raju k bawa shuru se mazoor nai the. Uno masjid k saamne baithke “Mazoor hoon baba, beti ki shadi karna hai, bete ku padana hai” bolke paise kamate the. 1 din 1 chaush namaz ku aaya tha, une chhupke dekha ine sahi mazoor hai kya bolke, toh poore loga gaye baad inke bawa hallu uthke naach letewe jaare the toh chaush ki phir gayi toh maar maarke sahi ka mazoor kar diya.

Beherhaal, admissions hogaye baad teeno Voulga CafĂ© pe milte ittefaq se, ittefaq kya bole toh teeno b chhota goldflake maarte rehte. Udhar se hojati teeno ki dosti. Dosti hogaye k baad mein exama aajate, ab engineering mein rahe toh aisich har thode din ku exama rehte. Toh exama aaye toh full padte padte pagal hojate. Dekhe toh Raju aur Farhan last aate, Rancho 1st aata. Kaisa aaya bole toh une bolta “Kaamyab hone k waaste nakko pado, qaabil hone k waaste pado” Wo baad mein malum hota Farhan aur Raju ku k une attender ku 10 rupaye deke paper nikalwaya tha.

Un logo ka principal rehta Dr. M. A. Malik bolke,
magar uske red color k baala rehte toh sab usku LBW bolte (laal balo wala) Toh 1 din Raju, Farhan aur Rancho Madina pe baithke biryani kheechte rehte, udhar LBW parcel lene aata, toh ye loga waiter ku amma bhen karte rehte, wo dekhke in logo k surata yaad rakh leta.
Viva k time pe badla nikalna hai bolke decide kar leta. Ab LBW ka lab hai so din ye loga jaate suba, jaake experiment kuch b nai aata, toh BKBB* (Barkath** k bade bhai) ku bole toh unu andar se purani record laake dete. Wo dekh k jaldi likh lete. Ab viva ki baari aate ki phat jati in logo ki, une andar bulaake wo sawala poochta, in logo k phepde tilli gurda upar niche hojata. 1 jawab b nai diye so dekh k une BKBB ku balata, bulake bolta “Ye 3 haule gaye baad next group ku bhejo.”

Ab ghusse mein LBW kya karta, results type karke upar likh deta k “No changes will be entertained” aur 3 haulo ku fail kar deta. Dusre din dekhe toh teeno haule top pe rehte. Wo asal hota kya bole toh Rancho LBW ki potti ku pata leta, pata leke bolta k agar printouts set kari toh INOX mein royal seat pe bithatou, toh une uchaak jati khushi se. Ab wo no changes wali condition ki waja se une wapis fail b nai kar sakta.

1 waqt kya hota, 1 bacha Bhaisa gau se rehta Asim bolke. Une 1 project banata, remote se chalne wali ghachchup ki bandi. Magar LBW wo project ku namanzoor kar deta toh Asim frustration mein aake suicide attempt karta- 1st floor pe se kood jata. Magar hota kuch b nai, pinda 1st floor pe se koodke koi marte?

Phir ye teeno haule hallu hallu papera clear karte karte,chittiya maar maarke final exams tak pohunch jaate. Aakhri 1 project rehta, wo project hua baad jobs mela rehta college mein.

Raju phir b 1 baar ku job karna chahta magar Farhan jo hai fotographer banna chahta, poore dosto k bhanje bhanjiyo k haqiqe mein inech leta fotua aur taraqqi karke shadiyo k aur valimo k lena chahta magar unke bawa nakko bolte. Phir Rancho samjhaya toh unke bawa b lite lelete, aur Farhan fotographer ban jaata. Raju Dell ka interview deta, usku b job mil jata. Rancho job nai dekhta, kaiku ki kya nai ki!

Ab masla ye hai ki wo project pass karna nai karna LBW k haath mein hai. Une b aisa bada haramka rehta, pass ich nai karta, tanga deta teeno haulo ku. Toh 1 waqt kya hota bole toh, LBW chetak pe jaate rehta, utte mein baarish full shuru hojaati, une jaldi ghar ku pohunch jaayinge sochta magar 1 manhole ka dhakkan khulla rehta usme iski gaadi phas jaati. Ab paani kammar tak aajata aur une gaadi rakh deke chalna shuru karta. Utte mein 1 ghar k saamne se jaate rehta, chhat pe se Rancho rassi phek k bolta k upar aajao, ine nakko bole toh b zabardasti karta toh ine chad jata rassi pe. Ab engineering ka dimagh lagane jaake sochta k pendulum motion mein hilaake upar kheechinge bolke hilaate ki rassi tootke seedha manhole k andar gir jaata une, aur behte behte ghar k paas k manhole mein se nikalta bahar. Haalaake Raju aur Farhan b the udhar, un loga bole nakko lagale bolke, magar suna nai- main pehleich bola sabse bada haula ineich rehta bolke.

Beherhaal, ye hone k baad LBW Raju aur Farhan ku bolta k agar un dono Rancho ka naam project mein se nikal diye toh pass kar detou, toh un loga usku baghair bole k naam nikal dete, aur paas hoke apna apna job shuru kar dete.

Rancho ku engineering complete karne aur 2 saal lagte, aisa atkaake rakh deta LBW usku. Wo hogaya baad Rancho woich karta jo Deccan college k sabse haule students karte- Deccan college mein lecturer ka job!!!

Aaaaalll izzz wellll!!!! :D :D :D LMAO hehe.... :) :)


2 comments:

user said...

wooow, this is amazingly funny!!!
you made my day

Anonymous said...

that was great !